Tag Archives: Feeling Goooooooood

June 11, 2010 · 6:53 pm

Big Up Yourself

Remembering your own best bits, what other bits you would like to have and what bits you would want in another person.

Big Up Yourself: Being Positive About Yourself is not Arrogant

When was the last time that someone encouraged you to think about yourself positively? Hmm? Well?

We are all used to thinking about ourselves negatively, “I feel fat”, “Blimey I’m thick”, “I can’t do this”, “Why do people spend time with me?” etc etc etc.

This is about changing that and getting you to think about yourself positively. Who you are, why people do like you, your best qualities.

Look at this list below and pick out as many qualities which apply to you. Then think of a sentence for why you are bubbly, think of an example.  Write this down somewhere or say it out loud. Then when you’re having a thick, fat, down moment go back to it and BIG UP YOURSELF!!! Think of it as a self-esteem pit-stop.

Or try this worksheet called ‘Would Like To Meet’ if you are interested in thinking about who you are and what kind of person you would like to meet/go out with. (click on the image to open full size)

In fact, why not write yours below?

Big up.

Bish

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November 18, 2009 · 1:16 pm

Getting Paid to Have Sex

Yo!

Lots of people have strong opinions about sex work: whether it’s right or wrong is up to you, but I’d encourage you to think about the reality of life for men and women involved in having sex for cash whatever you think.

If you are a sex worker and want to find a support project for sex workers near you then go to this brilliant website,  UK Network of Sex Work Projects, click on projects or on the map of the UK on the right. They can help you to stay safe, to deal with drug or alcohol use and to help you exit sex work.

I reckon that there are people in sex work who are fortunate and those that are less fortunate and some people who are in between.

For all sex workers there are other difficulties too.

  • It’s sometimes illegal to be a sex worker (or to earn money from a sex worker, in the UK)
  • It makes other relationships very difficult
  • It can make writing a future CV very difficult
  • It can be hard having a social life
  • It’s hard work (the ultimate customer service position)
  • Sometimes family aren’t that proud of their kids doing sex work

Now it makes me angry and sad that some people are treated very badly and become victims as a result of sex work. My anger and sadness is directed at people who

  • Force people to do this
  • Dodgy clients who don’t treat sex workers with respect
  • The laws which do not seek to protect sex workers in any way
  • The media that do not treat sex workers with the same dignity that they would treat non-sex workers
  • The problems of drugs and homelessness and the fact that we still have massive amounts of poverty.

People who are (or have been) sex workers who have chosen to blog their experiences, such as Belle de Jour, do not make me angry at all.

Here are some links you might be interested in.

Safety advice for sex workers from the UK Network of Sex Work Projects

The International Union of Sex Workers http://www.iusw.org/

Here’s an interesting blog from a former male sex worker Post Grad Gigolo

And one of my twitter chums tweets about her good and bad experiences as a sex worker here

Brook FPA THT

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November 14, 2009 · 11:20 am

Be At Your Very Best

Hello Bish Fans.

I’m feeling a little bit naughty because I’ve kind of taken the idea from an advertising campaign for American Express (the provider of excellent credit card services, worldwide). But their ads were so positive and so beautiful that I couldn’t resist making them about something positive, rather than just spending money….

Also I’ve made a little thing that you can fill out to make your own plan. What are you going to be? Go crazy and aim high. Download it (click on the thumbnail, right click, save image) print it out and fill it out. Keep it safe, focus, work hard and achieve.

future

And why is this all in a blog about sex and relationships? You’re smart, I’m sure you can work it out.

Brook FPA THT

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October 20, 2009 · 9:21 am

Talk to the Hand – how to say NO and have someone listen

It can be hard saying no to someone if you don’t want to do something. Remember you are saying no to them but yes to you. Big ups innit?

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October 1, 2009 · 9:59 am

Self Esteem

 

Hello you!

This is quite an important post because it’s about you. Good self-esteem (feeling good about yourself), in my humble opinion, is the most important factor in being good at sex, good at relationships, good at chatting people up, good at being a mate, good at parties and good at looking after yourself.

An important thing to remember here. Self-esteem is not always something we can control. Our health (physical and mental health*), our financial situation, our identity and experience of stigma, the way we are treated by others because of who we are, our ability can all affect how we feel about ourselves. But by changing things we can control we can make us feel better about ourselves.

(*If you’re regularly feeling crap/down/shit then maybe try visiting this brilliant website or speak to your GP about things)

 

It’s quite difficult to change feelings but you can change thoughts or behaviours. If we start to do positive things (things we know will make us feel better), even if we aren’t feeling very positive, this can kickstart some better self-esteem and we can start being better to ourselves. Need a self-esteem pitstop? Go to this page and pick 5 things about yourself.

Listen to this, it’s brilliant:

mp3_selfesteem

If you click on the picture an mp3 should open in your music program on your computer, you can also right click and save it to your computer or phone.

It’s about how to get good self-esteem. Make sure you listen out for the fart gag.

It’s taken from this book by David Hodgson. If I won the lottery I would buy a copy of this book for every teenager in the UK.  They have a great website too with other great downloads and extracts. There’s also a personality type quiz where you can find out whether you are a Black Bear, an Eagle or a Clown Fish (that would be me).

Buzz header

For all you adults reading this who are interested it’s a combination of Jungian personality theory and NLP. You should read it too, but you’ll have to get your own copy.

Shout out to Carol Painter and Jo Adams.

Brook THT  FPA

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