Tag Archives: Self Esteem
On Scars
Filed under Uncategorized
Big Up Yourself
Remembering your own best bits, what other bits you would like to have and what bits you would want in another person.
When was the last time that someone encouraged you to think about yourself positively? Hmm? Well?
We are all used to thinking about ourselves negatively, “I feel fat”, “Blimey I’m thick”, “I can’t do this”, “Why do people spend time with me?” etc etc etc.
This is about changing that and getting you to think about yourself positively. Who you are, why people do like you, your best qualities.
Look at this list below and pick out as many qualities which apply to you. Then think of a sentence for why you are bubbly, think of an example. Write this down somewhere or say it out loud. Then when you’re having a thick, fat, down moment go back to it and BIG UP YOURSELF!!! Think of it as a self-esteem pit-stop.
Or try this worksheet called ‘Would Like To Meet’ if you are interested in thinking about who you are and what kind of person you would like to meet/go out with. (click on the image to open full size)
In fact, why not write yours below?
Big up.
Bish
Filed under Feeling Goooooooood
Don’t Ask Danny, Ask Bish!
You may have heard about the controversy of Danny Dyer’s advice to a young man in Zoo Magazine (read about it here if you like). But I don’t think that the letter was answered properly, so I’m going to have a go! Be aware though I’m not in the least bit hard, I’ve never knowingly said the word geezer and I actively avoid getting into fights.
“I’m 23, not a bad looking bloke with a decent job, but I broke up with my missus a few months ago and can’t get over her. She seems to be doing fine. Any advice? ALEX, MANCHESTER”
Hey Man
I’m really sorry to hear about this dawg, break-ups suck hard. Most people suffer heartbreak over the years and it can sometimes feel that it will never end. However it will, trust me.
Firstly don’t assume that your ex is fine, she’s probably gutted about it too. You don’t mention whether it was a mutual break-up or whatever but people behave in different ways to try and cope with difficult feelings. It could be that she’s putting a brave face on it or ‘faking it till she makes it’. In a sense this is what I’d advise you to do.
You should spend time thinking about the end of a relationship, think about what actually happened, how did you feel, what have you learnt about yourself, do you need to work on stuff, how do you feel about you, what kind of person do you want to go out with? But don’t over think. Draw a line under it and move on. You wouldn’t be able to go back to exactly how it was anyway so don’t try.
Sometimes changing what we do can change how we think and what we feel (read my post about this here). So fake it till you make it. Go out, get drunk with your mates, flirt with some other women, learn to feel desired again. Get busy. Do the stuff you couldn’t do in a relationship. Take up some hobbies, get active, learn something new. You won’t feel better by making her feel worse.
You’ve got a bright future ahead of you and you will have an amazing relationship in the future. Trust me and believe in yourself.
Bish
Filed under Relationships
Be At Your Very Best
Hello Bish Fans.
I’m feeling a little bit naughty because I’ve kind of taken the idea from an advertising campaign for American Express (the provider of excellent credit card services, worldwide). But their ads were so positive and so beautiful that I couldn’t resist making them about something positive, rather than just spending money….
Also I’ve made a little thing that you can fill out to make your own plan. What are you going to be? Go crazy and aim high. Download it (click on the thumbnail, right click, save image) print it out and fill it out. Keep it safe, focus, work hard and achieve.
And why is this all in a blog about sex and relationships? You’re smart, I’m sure you can work it out.
Brook FPA THT
Filed under Feeling Goooooooood
Self Esteem
Hello you!
This is quite an important post because it’s about you. Good self-esteem (feeling good about yourself), in my humble opinion, is the most important factor in being good at sex, good at relationships, good at chatting people up, good at being a mate, good at parties and good at looking after yourself.
An important thing to remember here. Self-esteem is not always something we can control. Our health (physical and mental health*), our financial situation, our identity and experience of stigma, the way we are treated by others because of who we are, our ability can all affect how we feel about ourselves. But by changing things we can control we can make us feel better about ourselves.
(*If you’re regularly feeling crap/down/shit then maybe try visiting this brilliant website or speak to your GP about things)
It’s quite difficult to change feelings but you can change thoughts or behaviours. If we start to do positive things (things we know will make us feel better), even if we aren’t feeling very positive, this can kickstart some better self-esteem and we can start being better to ourselves. Need a self-esteem pitstop? Go to this page and pick 5 things about yourself.
Listen to this, it’s brilliant:
If you click on the picture an mp3 should open in your music program on your computer, you can also right click and save it to your computer or phone.
It’s about how to get good self-esteem. Make sure you listen out for the fart gag.
It’s taken from this book by David Hodgson. If I won the lottery I would buy a copy of this book for every teenager in the UK. They have a great website too with other great downloads and extracts. There’s also a personality type quiz where you can find out whether you are a Black Bear, an Eagle or a Clown Fish (that would be me).
For all you adults reading this who are interested it’s a combination of Jungian personality theory and NLP. You should read it too, but you’ll have to get your own copy.
Shout out to Carol Painter and Jo Adams.
Brook THT FPA
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Filed under Feeling Goooooooood
