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Solo Sex – The Masturbation Manual

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Solo Sex – The Masturbation Manual

How to masturbate (or wank for UK readers). Not everyone does it, but solo sex is a great way of exploring what you like.

Not everyone likes it  – which is fine. And not everyone likes to do it in the same way, which is also obviously fine. Here are some different ideas that you might find work for you. So long as you are in private, you don’t feel like you’re doing it too much and you aren’t hurting yourself then it’s fine. If you notice any soreness or any bleeding then please stop. More about that here.

[warning – masturbation drawings ahead]


Touching the clitoris
Bish masturbation touching the clitorisThe outside of the clitoris is very sensitive, so some people like to touch it. It has a skin ‘hood’ covering it to protect it as it is really sensitive. People stroke it through this skin or directly and lightly with wet fingers. As most of the clitoris is inside the vulva you may feel the whole area start to swell and throb.

Touching the glans
Bish masturbation light strokesThe glans (aka ‘bell-end’) of the penis is very sensitive and people like to stroke this area in a similar way that people stroke the outside of the clitoris. Like the clitoris it often has skin which covers this area (known as foreskin) and can feel nice to touch. Also touching the glans lightly with wet fingers can feel nice.

Exploring inside
Bish masturbation exploring insideYou may want to try exploring inside the vagina too. This might feel uncomfortable at first so it’s okay not to do it, or to insert the smallest finger first. You could also just explore the outside of the vagina to see how it feels. The vagina will usually be wet if the person is aroused but some people find they need a bit more lubricant, such as water based lubricant or even their own saliva.

Some people also enjoy touching around and inside the anus too. It’s a good idea to use lubricant and to make sure that nails are trimmed. Notice what feels good for you. If anything feels uncomfortable please just stop. Don’t make yourself do anything you don’t want to.

The classic w*nk
Bish masturbation the classic wankThe hand acts like a pump moving the foreskin back and forward over bell end which is a very sensitive part of the penis. It’s meant to feel similar to entry sex but the hand can provide more stimulation and more pressure. For circumcised penises, this is still a popular method, but they may need additional lubrication so that the glans doesn’t get dry and sore (vaseline, cocoa butter, baby oil, water based lube if you’re using condoms).

Sex toys
Bish masturbation sex toysLots of people like using sex toys to masturbate. There are lots of different ones for the clitoris, vagina, anus and penis. If you are going to use them you should also get some lubricant. If you plan to share them or use them in different openings you should clean them or put condoms on in between. You usually need to be 18 to get sex toys. I’m getting questions from under 18s who are using objects they find around the house as sex toys – as you can see here this can cause problems.

More ways …
It’s basically okay to touch yourself however feels nice. Different lubricants, using two hands, using the other hand, turning the hand around the other way, lying in a different position, trying to delay coming for as long as possible (this helps to control when you orgasm/ejaculate), using more than one sex toy, penetrating the anus (use lube, wash hands afterwards and before touching any other part of the body), using water, using a shower head, doing it in the bath (don’t hog the bathroom though), massaging the testicles, rubbing against a pillow, stroking nipples, not using your hands at all (some people report being able to orgasm without any touch at all), feathers, moving your hands in a different direction, touching yourself in other areas.

Self love playlist
There have been so many great songs in the history of modern popular music that I thought it would be remiss of me not to put a couple in here.
This is ‘Vibrate’ by Outkast which also seems to celebrate black history

This is John Peel’s favourite song (if you don’t know him, you should); ‘Teenage Kicks’ by The Undertones. The beginning is missing, which is annoying, anyway…

And this is ‘I Touch Myself’ by Divynls

© Justin Hancock 2015

Title: Solo Sex – The Masturbation Manual

Category: Sex

Tags: Clitoris Masturbation Orgasm Penis

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36 Comment(s)

  • I’m not sure your advice about using vibrators making it harder to reach orgasm in other ways is really true. Any numbing effect would be very temporary, so it might make it harder to come again within a couple of hours, but otherwise orgasmic capacity should remain unchanged. Do you have any further info to back up this assertion? Would be interested to see genuine research into this area.

    • bishtraining says:

      Thanks. I did say sometimes though….

      • Indeed. It just seems to be one of those myths that people trot out from time to time, but not based on any actual evidence. Having worked as a sex educator for several years, I’ve never met anyone who has found the use of a vibrator to be anything other than a positive thing, and no-one who has said it has diminished their orgasmic capacity. Just wondered if there was any research into this…

    • Louise says:

      I have to admit that vibrators have always made it harder for me to reach orgasm; the numbing sensation lasts quite a while for me so in the end I normally just use my fingers to avoid the side-effects of numbness. Personal experience here, not a research paper ;).

      • Joseph says:

        Isn’t the numbness pleasurable?
        Sorry, I’m a man so I don’t know how it feels, but I want to ask my girlfriend to try having fun on herself.

  • bishtraining says:

    I don’t think I’ve suggested that vibrators are negative or that they can diminish someone’s orgasmic capacity. If you don’t like what I’ve had to say, why not go and write your own website for teens?

  • It’s not that I don’t like what you have to say at all, I’m just interested in exploring some of the points you’ve made.

    I do write my own blog and run my own website, thanks! Although it’s aimed at adults, not teenagers.

  • I found a link this week and thought you might be interested to see it. It’s taken from Betty Dodson’s excellent website, and addresses the question of whether using a vibrator can affect your sexual response/sensitivity:
    [in short: answer, no; but we can all get used to only doing things one way]

  • By the way, my website is
    Come on over some time!

  • dan white says:

    these picture make me hard

  • Phillip says:

    i think i have learned more of what i did’nt know even though i like having sex with big grownups.thanks

  • Megan says:

    Hi bishuk, could you tell me what ‘dry humping’ is? Im old enough to know b.t.w, Just thought you should know. :p Well, I luv ur site also :)

  • Travis says:

    I just turned 14 last week and I’m wondering what “phone sex” is, my sister talks about time all the time.( she’s 17)

  • agalo says:

    its nice to masturbate

  • eject says:

    Most teens like to wank two or three times a day (myself included) normally in the shower or in bed. However, if you leave off for a few days, you will have a huge orgasm. It seems the more semen you eject, the greater your orgasm and your pleasure. Remember to clean up – peel back your foreskin and wash with warm soapy water – if you are uncut remember that your penis can leak after masturbation and it stays under the foreskin. Luckily, my parents had me ‘cut’ so that my glans is always outside.

  • Ashley says:

    Hello I was worrying how do you really have sex I’m 12 and I just want to know I don’t know why I do but I do I know this is kinda worried

    • Victor says:

      Ashley I’m 12 to (I’m a guy) Ashley is a hot name,u put the penis into the vagina and the guy moves up and down and u r having sex.p.s. what state do u live in.

      That was a weird question☺

  • kieren little says:

    Hi I am new to this website plz someone give me a Q. I am 16yrs of age.

  • Joshua says:

    I’m 12 13 in two days and I want sex btw I’m a boy

  • Joshua says:

    Help me

  • Joshua says:

    Hay Nathan do you play cop n robbers:)

  • Joshua says:

    Thnx Nathan:)

  • Joshua says:

    I realy apritiate that :D

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